50 Cent Opens Up About His Grandmother’s Death, Drugs And Music In New Interview

In a new interview with ‘The Big Issue’ magazine as part of the ‘Letter To My Younger Self’ series, 50 talked about his violent history, how his grandmother’s death really affected him, and how music served as his escape from that life.

His grandmother raised him when his mum, who was a drug dealer, got killed. So he felt devastated when she also passed away.

“I’ve seen a lot of people pass in the neighbourhood, I’ve lost them to motorcycles or altercations or drugs. But none of them impacted like when my grandmother died. She was the love of my life.” he fondly reminisced.

Read more excerpts from the interview below… you can read the full interview at The Big Issue

At 16 I had already been involved in street life for years [50 Cent started dealing drugs at 12]. I was aggressive enough to get by on the street – but then I’d go home and be my grandmother’s baby. I was outside hustling but I still had to talk my grandmother into letting me walk home from school myself. I said to her, look, I’m bigger than you now.

I think shock is the best way to describe how I felt when my mother died. I didn’t understand it. To have a single parent as your guardian – they’re your whole life. I was eight. I was just like, what do you mean? She had spent a lot of time away from me, she was always hustling. She had to be very tough, to be around a lot of men… she had to adapt.

When you get hurt as bad as I did [he was shot nine times at close range in 2000] you become afraid of everything because you know anything can happen at any time. I got shot in the afternoon, broad daylight. So I got scared, and that made me harder than I was before. The only time I was comfortable was when I didn’t care. So I just said – f*ck it. When you have the pistol and you’re looking for them, your attention is shifted. You’re not afraid anymore. You’re like, I hope that is them coming up the block now.

I started writing lyrics full time in 1997. I met Jam Master Jay from Run DMC and he had his label, which would take people on and develop them until they were ready to go to a major. Jay taught me how to count bars – and when the chorus should start and stop. And I kept practising. Sometimes hard work beats talent. I wrote all the time, and so I got better and better.

If I could talk to my teenage self, I’d tell him to focus on music with a stronger intensity. He could still have this career without going through all the things I went through. And thinking about relationships – I think back to when I was with someone and that person could have been the person I was going to be with for the rest of my life but I didn’t have the references yet to know there was something special there. It’s like the clarity I got about my grandmother after she was gone. Some people have been better at that than me. If I look at Jay Z, I’d point out he capitalised on people better than I did.